Wes Keyes Guest Blog #2

For those of you who don’t know Wes, here’s some pictures so you get an idea of who you’re dealing with…

Riding the bus in Seattle:

Ok, let me start this with a little background and why this situation started in the first place.  I am a procrastinator, always have been and short of a miracle (I don’t believe in them anyways), always will be.  Know that I hate driving, and if I didn’t need a truck I wouldn’t own one.  My truck only has 60k miles on it and I really don’t pay attention when services need done to it.  So after I became aware that I was a few thousand miles overdue for an oil change I finally got one a few months later.  Before oil change = No Problems, After = truck stalls on freeway and I pay $150 for a tow truck.  F-ing bastards….. and since I was a mechanic, I automatically think I can fix everything, which i usually can.  But I have neither the time or patience to F with it.

This leads me to my first point, the bus….  now up until this point in my life I’ve never really spent much time on a bus besides first grade and that was only for a year.  I am a huge supporter of public transportation, buses, subways, trolleys, I like them all.  Its better for the environment and like i said earlier, I really hate cars. Today being one of my very limited bus trips, it has really been an experience.  Never in my entire life have I been in a place with so many shitty smells and just plain crazy fucking people.  Landfills, bathrooms with puke and or shit, nursing homes etc.,  we all know those smells. Landfills smell like rotten garbage and everyone knows what shit and puke smell like.

The smells coming from bus 538 were some of the most rankest smells I have ever have ever smelt. I will attempt to describe it for you but I really don’t think I can do it justice, but I’ll try.  Along with the typical diesel, random people smells such as work and restaurants, there were old people that you know haven’t showered or been out of their house for weeks until today. Cat piss, stacks of rotting newspaper and moldy Sanka. And not to pick on the homeless again but come the fuck on… like they really need to be on the bus in the first place.  Just because the bus is free downtown doesn’t mean that you have to ride it.  I know you dont fucking go anywhere, the Free Ride Zone in downtown Seattle is not that fucking big. After a long day at work, the last thing I want to smell is you.  I almost threw up today, REALLY!!

When I first got on the bus today it was crowded, and after standing for a few minutes, I realized that there was a little bit of room to sit down. Upon sitting down I realized why there was room. There was the grossest person alive sitting to the other side that I had not noticed.  I think he had a pine tree air freshener on, which would be why i didnt notice the smell and immediately move.  After sitting, He started hacking and coughing.  I thought i was going to get aids or something. It was the kind of cough that is bringing shit up with it, almost like an alien was trying to escape from his chest.  And at this point you cant get up because more people have gotten on and there isnt room to stand up anymore, so I kind of just buried my head in my jacket and hoped that he would leave soon.

I really dont want to go on any longer so Im just going to list the things and people that made me angry today on the bus: Homeless guy with all of your shit stuffed under my seat, crazy guy talking to himself about secret clubs and how he would like to be crucified ( I thought he was on a bluetooth for almost 10min), lady with more human hair woven into her nasty fleece than in her head, Shitty people that insist on giving other shitty people shitty advice and say it loud enough so everyone can hear how stupid and shitty they are, asshole bus drivers that give people attitude if they ask questions, annoying teenage kids that talk loud and are rude and bump into you while you’re trying to stand with out getting too close to the pukey cough guy, the lady that said excuse me when getting off at her stop but it was really sarcastic and rude.
I will continue to update everyone on my journeys in public transportation.  Next time I’ll tell you about my plane ride home from Charlotte and why I think infants should either be banned from flying on airplanes or be put in a pet carrier down with the luggage.

WesK